Can Independence lead to Indifference?


The answer is YES!

Since I have migrated in this country, I have greatly witnessed how I grew a lot. Where dependence was my number one necessity, this country taught me to trust myself more than anyone else. It feels great honestly but there are times when I will linger on thoughts I did not used to have. Before anything else, what does indifference mean? In Merriam-Webster’s dictionary, it is clearly defined as lack of interest, concern, or sympathy. This definition can be associated with all our relationships from how we see ourselves to how we treat other people.

Maybe you have also experienced them or you had or sooner or later (hopefully not), you will experience them so I just want to share some realizations I have had the past few months on some boundaries independence has:

We forget who we really are.
Explanation: After becoming so involved to the world and attaining my personal goals, I tend to lose focus on who I really am. I don’t know if that’s a good or a bad thing, but during my involvement, I feel great.. where I believed that I have learned so much from how to converse with people to how I should present myself. However, the effect is inevitable. There are moments like these where I just sit in my bedroom, look outside, and think of nothing or probably everything. I just realize how my values have changed, where sometimes it’s not always for the better. I have learned to be selfish of what I want and became more ambitious.
Lesson learned? Definitely. The first few months were difficult, but since Christmas passed and the New Year has started, I always remind myself of who I was and what values I treasure the most. (humility, honesty, and integrity.)

We forget our loved ones.
Explanation: I can associate this with the first reason since we allot so much time for our personal desires and climbing our way up to be socially accepted by the community, we forget those people who were there first when we were in boiling waters. It may be a our own God, a significant other, parents, a relative, a best friend, or just anyone who pops in our head when we feel lonely. For me, I will highlight all of the above. It used to be not as hard, graduating from high school but only a few distance away from those people and for my family, just few steps away since we all live in one house. However, now that I have graduated, it is harder than I expected to keep in touch and to allot time for those people who I treasure the most.
Lesson learned? yes, all coming from my heart. I have learned that the best relationships are made during hard times. These are the moments when our loyalty and friendship are tested the most. I have been busy all the time that even my loved ones are too sweet to let me decide on which dates I was free to talk or hang out with them. I didn’t like this scenario. I want them to feel their importance so from now on I will make sure to have my weekends dedicated to keeping in touch with everyone. (: In short, as the English teacher of Charlie told him, participate.

We gain confidence, but we lose trust.
Explanation: I have always had a problem about confidence and trust. I just don’t get how to develop trust after finding out how cruel the world is. People are born good, definitely but with all the desires of the world, temptation is hard to resist. Some may be strong enough to stay away from all of these things, but how about the rest who believes that the only way to survive is by saving oneself and that life is all about proving yourself to the world. How about try just putting you best foot forward without having the goal of being better than other people? (this is just an opinion, nothing more)
Lesson learned? Not yet though I am on my way. Before I derive to any conclusion, I make sure that I will understand first and to never judge. 

That was quite a breeze. Now that I have gave you my realizations, let us forget what happened in the past and just remember what we have learned from it. It is always a bright new day everyday (even if it’s Winter time already) and there is no time left to waste. Here is a simple photo I have to help you reminisce the good memories of yesterday and to have high hopes of tomorrow. ❤

Winter, even if it’s known to be a gloomy season, still possess beauty. We just have to see the brighter side of things. Then again, #YOLO